Sunday, 4 August 2013 | By: AbhiLaSH RuHeLa

Not Every One whom I talk to should be called My Friend!!!

909th BLOG POST -->>

       
  It's Friendship Day. How can you ignore it even if you are against such dramatic celebrations that has no special role in life. All is meant just for the sake of giving footage that we are no more Indians and see how much modernization I have particularly gone through to become updated and a party-thing. Out of this that my generation is currently busy in, what's left for someone like me, a writer who stays at home and searches for topic to write on and bring awareness or entertain the masses. For me such days work as a day of speech when I get a topic to write up on. I know that I will get more and more hits and people on my website because they are particularly trying to involve themselves as much as possible in anything that's related with the day. Hence today, I would be talking up on what actually Friend in life is. What according to me is the criteria when I'll call someone "My Friend".

            Suppose if I am waiting for a friend to come at a mall. He comes within few minutes with a friend of his. He introduces me to him and all three of us chit-chat about our life, work and experiences. Laugh on the past that we have gone through. And after 4-5 hours of extreme chit-chatting, my friend gets an urgent call and he leaves. But as promised that he would stay till evening, he does not take his friend with him. He leaves him so that I have a company. After half an hour of talking with this guy that I was introduced few hours back, I find an old friend of mine scrolling in the mall all alone. I give him a voice and call him. We hug and he joins us. Now, how would I introduce this man who's my friend's friend. I can never introduce this guy as,"Hey Chetan, meet Mahesh. He is my latest entry in Friend List". It would be as awkward to Mahesh as me. I would simply introduce him as "Hey Chetan. He is Sahil's friend. I just met him 5 hours back and since we are bonding quite well". This looks fine. I didn't say that he's my friend nor did I made him feel isolated, I tried to make him feel special too.

            Now, I am in MCA and there are certain guys with whom I have interacted for just once or twice. They come to college, they sit on their bench, hear what is being taught, go home and study. Simultaneously, I do the same and lead my life. If some day both of us meet each other on some local train station and start talking about assignments and I find this Chetan again. How will I introduce my classmate to him now. Unlike all of you, I would directly say,"Hey Chetan. He is Sawant, my colleague. We are in the same division". That's all. I don't need to call him a Friend. I hope these two examples make you understand what I mean to say. Not everyone you know is your friend. You may be with the person from last 8 years but its not necessary to introduce him as your friend if you can not share your secrets with him. The only people with whom you find peace, you can share any expression of yours, you don't think twice before speaking something, you can call them a Friend. 

            Now, you'll say,"But I have a better compatibility with almost everyone I know. I share everything of mine with all the people I know. If I go to market and purchase 10,000 rs's cloths for me, I send a SMS to everyone in my contact. All are my Friends. I am a good guy. Not someone as calculative as you." This is why you will one day find yourself stuck in the biggest problem while I would be rejoicing with only those 2 friends with whom I found myself compatible with. Even if there would be some misunderstanding with them, I would go and solve it out because I know that I have only bunch of friends who can be counted on one hand. But if you will start disliking someone after a point of time, you won't devote much of your time considering an ego fact that "Mere paas aur bhi dost hain. Agar usko lagta hai ki uski galti hai toh woh aaye. Main kyon jaaun". Your enmity with him will keep aggravating as everyone for you is a friend so you'll share this secret of yours with everyone that why you got parted with him. While if something that would happen between me and my friend, only I would be knowing about it. I will be having no one else to bitch about him. That's Friend. Not everyone you know.

              For me the people living in my society are just the people living in my society. For me the people in my college are just my college mate and nothing above it. For me the people who were in my school are just my previous classmates and nothing over that. Until and unless, I find that I am very much compatible with someone and he/she is always there for me. I read an interview of Katrina Kaif where she was asked who are her friends in the industry to which she directly said that she is in talking terms by naming few actresses and then added to it, that, she just loves talking to them but they aren't her friends. She said this without giving a second thought that her bluntness might hurt the actresses whom she named. This is what I am trying to tell. :-)

         If I am in trouble and the person comes to me and shows how incapable he/she is and hence can't do anything to reduce my anxiety, I would only consider him/her an association in life. Not a Friend. Because a friend definitely struggles with you in whatever time he/she gets after his college/work time. I, myself, would stop a person to give the time that is his to me. Give me only the time that's leisure. Not more than that. At the end of life, it would be only your wife, children and parents with you. Friends only come after you have breathe your last to tell how good a person you were. Not when you are struggling with finances and health during your last phase. Hence, your family is the only best friend of yours. Others can be. But not more than 5. If there are, go through a reality check or life will checkmate you.

             
 Thanks.

 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU!!!

4 CoMMenTs !!! - U CaN aLSo CoMMenT !!!:

Amit Pithadia said...

Nice post...

Bloggers Listing
its my walls

Tanvi Gaikwad said...

A nice light portrayed on who really could be really considered as F.R.I.E.N.D.S. We add around 100's of people on FB but its really a thoughtful question..who all from that list will really stand for us.. In fact honestly to tell, the person closest to me is not even in my FB list :)

Isha Naidu said...

Wooow well.said abhi...u made me realise who is my friend and who is not...and you are true Family is always your Best Bestest Best Friend.. Keep it Cuming.. Tc GBU Abhi.. :)

Sonali Mukherji said...

amazing blog! :)

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